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Amore: An American Father's Roman Holiday, by Roger Friedland
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Part memoir, part cultural exploration, Amore follows an American father as he and his teenage daughters journey into the heart of Rome, into the way Romans love and what they have to teach about its erosion in America.
As his twin daughters approached adolescence, sociologist Roger Friedland was worried. The thing that most bothered him was not the erotic heat of its youth culture, but the lovelessness of its sex.
Offered the chance to live and teach in Rome, Roger and his wife, Debra, seized the opportunity to take their family to live in a city where love is alive, family bonds hold, divorce and rape are rare, and “ciao, bella” is a constant refrain.
In Amore, Friedland shares the stories of his family’s enchanted and unnerving passage into the heart of Rome and considers its lessons for America where love is at risk.
Amore is a love story, a family’s voyage between two states of feeling.
- Sales Rank: #480523 in Books
- Brand: Friedland, Roger
- Published on: 2014-11-04
- Released on: 2014-11-04
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.00" h x .97" w x 5.31" l, .0 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 432 pages
Review
“This is a fascinating contrasting of the quality of life in the U.S. and that in Rome and what the difference may mean for the future of family life and national destiny.” (Booklist)
“Intelligent, thoughtful and well-researched, Friedland’s book is not only a love letter to Rome, but also to his daughters and the members of their generation, for whose personal happiness he fears.” (Kirkus Reviews)
“This fascinating cultural comparison will open readers’ eyes to the serious problems surrounding love and intimacy in the United States.” (Shelf Awareness)
From the Back Cover
As his twin daughters approached adolescence, sociologist Roger Friedland was worried. The thing that most bothered him was not the erotic heat of America’s youth culture, but the lovelessness of its sex. Offered the chance to live and teach in Rome, Roger and his wife, Debra, seized the opportunity to take their family to live in a city where love is alive, family bonds hold, divorce and rape are rare, and “ciao, bella” is a constant refrain.
In Amore, Friedland shares the stories of his family’s enchanted and unnerving passage into the heart of Rome, and considers its lessons for America, where love is at risk.
Amore is a love story, a father’s exploration of the ways of life and love in Rome, and what they have to teach us about the erosion of romance in America.
About the Author
Roger Friedland is a cultural sociologist who studies love, sex, and God. Professor of Religious Studies and Sociology at the University of California, Santa Barbara, and New York University, he is also the coauthor of The Fellowship: The Untold Story of Frank Lloyd Wright and the Taliesin Fellowship (with Harold Zellman). He lives with his wife in Santa Barbara, California.
Most helpful customer reviews
15 of 17 people found the following review helpful.
Looking at Love Through Rome-Colored Glasses
By takingadayoff
Amore is about a family who moved from California to Rome for two years as the two daughters transitioned to their teen years. Roger Friedland, the father, is a professor of sex and religion at UC Santa Barbara, a school which has a bit of a party reputation. He'd learned enough about the students' sex lives to be alarmed at the idea of his daughters becoming women in a hook-up atmosphere where even middle school kids are engaging in presidential sex acts. Having lived in Rome several times over the years, the Friedlands decide that Italy will be a healthier environment to learn about sex and love.
Friedland is a romantic and tends to see what he wants to see. Yes, the statistics show that rape is rare in Italy (throughout the book, Friedland uses "Rome" and "Italy" almost interchangeably - perhaps Rome really is representative of Italy as a whole) and that divorce is also rare. He acknowledges that couples in Rome who might divorce in America stay married in Italy and have affairs. He seems to think that's good for the children and maybe it is, but there are no statistics for that. He also admits that what we would consider sexual harrassment in America (unwanted touching, staring, crude comments) is commonplace in Italy, but that the women there seem to handle it with aplomb. Perhaps most annoyingly, he tries to blame feminism for the broken families in America. By going out to earn livings, women have destroyed the family unit and emasculated men. This seems willfully blind to the fact that it has been some decades now since a single income has been enough for most families to live comfortably.
He talks about the Catholic church and how it influences the Italians, about the financial slump that keeps Italian children from finding jobs and moving out of their parents' homes. He discusses his own parents and his and his wife's struggle to become parents. And from time to time he even talks about the daughters, ending with what seems almost an afterthought, that for one of them, it was not a romantic interlude at all or as the subtitle suggests, a Roman holiday. Quite the opposite.
11 of 13 people found the following review helpful.
Offensive on so many levels
By Carol T.
Faced with anxiety about the "coming of age" of his daughters in the modern social atmosphere of meaningless American hook ups, Roger, a father and professor of sex and religion, makes the decision to move his family to Rome in order to avert the onslaught of sexual opportunities his daughters will face in their formative years.
Having lived in Rome previously, he sees the city as a barrier to the bad American environment and perhaps the girls can learn a thing or two about love and sex from the peoples who know best - the Italians.
I have to admit that Roger annoyed me quite a bit as I'm not one of those people who think Europe is superior to all things American. Having spent a good amount of time in Italy, personally, I can say the atmosphere feels more promiscuous and the problem of adultery in Italy is comparable to no other country. It's rampant. But Roger thinks dishonesty and cheating and the sexual harassment women face on a daily basis in Italy is a better example for his daughters. Italy is still very much a man's world and to me, Roger's decision to force his girls to live in that kind of environment comes off as patriarchal and oppressive. He wants to teach his daughters to accept male dominance with style and he also feels that it's women's faults for destroying the traditional male-dominated family system by becoming independent and joining the workforce (amongst other things). So he's also not a big fan of feminism either. To be even more offensive, he uses Catholicism to suggest a certain level of piety exists in Italy and not in America. Or that it's used to keep people in line, as he seems to think it should be.
Roger is a bit of a jerk. But that's just me.
I'm just not a fan of this book. What else can I say?
8 of 10 people found the following review helpful.
To Rome: A Love Letter On Steroids . . . .
By SundayAtDusk
This memoir/travel book sounded so interesting. But, in the beginning of the book, the way Roger Friedland kept going on and on about Rome made me wonder: Is he going to keep on like this? Well, yes and no. He does change the subject to other things, such as his family, but that, too, would go on and on. For example, he and his wife had infertility problems, so there is a long detailed account of the matter in the book, much like the long, detailed articles one reads in women's magazines. Oh, and don't get the author started about the sexual mores of today's youth. Once again, he just goes on and on and on about the topic. He obviously doesn't know when to stop talking about anything or anyone. It's too much information too much of the time. Thus, instead of feeling enlightened or charmed by the end of the book, I had extremely negative feelings about Rome, Santa Barbara, teenagers, college kids, Roger Friedland and his family. Moreover, I can't imagine at all this book helping to reverse "love's erosion in America", or helping to increase tourism in Rome.
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